I love Velcro. I think it’s one of man’s greatest inventions — next to the pizza pocket and the non-invasive liposuction. I think Batman’s utility belt is made up of one long strip of Velcro, stuck with random weapons he would grab on the way out of the Bat Cave. Velcro is brilliant.
When my babies were actually babies, I took Velcro stick-ons and applied them to walls, bags and strollers; so we did not have to dash for the essentials. Supplies were always one quick rip away. I would chose shoes that had Velcro laces so my kids would learn early on how to dress themselves. I changed the kids’ pants zippers to Velcro for easy removal in “emergencies”. They also never had to deal with open flies. The eraser was Velcro’ed to the white board. The remote was Velcro’ed to the corresponding AV equipment.
Fast forward years ahead. Velcro has become a symbol to me of my need to make life easier for my children. It’s me cutting up their meat into perfect cubes. It’s my need to see them go into their classroom on the first day of school and immediately find their future best friend. It’s my insane, useless coaching that comes before the kids go to their co-ed mixers. It’s me wanting to get sick if that means my children don’t have to.
Now that my eldest is turning 21, my 13-year old is entering the 10th grade and my nine-year old is getting invitations to vacation in Palawan without her family, I awaken to the hard fact that Velcro Mom should take the back seat. Don’t get me wrong — she is still in the car; but she should let Poker-Face Mom drive.
Poker-Face Mom is tolerant of failure. She reminds the kids to stop the juvenile rough housing, and shuts her ears to whoever ends up wailing in pain. She listens, without batting an eyelash, to the story of how one kid accidentally punctured the other kid’s face with a drinking straw. She watches her kids struggle and lets them be; because she realizes that, sooner or later, they have to know how to handle whatever life throws at them. This is the only way the kids can be prepared for that proverbial MMA fight called life.
There is a line, of course. Poker-Face Mom would never forsake her kids needs and their safety. But she sees more opportunities for education in independence and stamina by controlling her need to jump in at every turn. Poker Face Mom is the laid-back version of Velcro mom, who has become wiser over years. Yes, she also has more body fat.